Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Facility disturbed us.

Well, that tour of an elderly care facility didn't go so well. When we entered the dementia specific area there were 30-40 elderly people just sitting around one large room, yet there were other lounge type rooms rooms where they could have sat and even some nice outdoor areas. I was told they were waiting for their dinner yet it was only 4pm. How did they get so many dementia type residents to all be quiet, and I mean silent, not a sound and stay seated? And we passed through that room twice and still no one was chatting. All of the residents were in that room. It was as if they didn't have the choice to be anywhere else. Was this because they were short of staff, were the residents medicated to keep them so docile? Plus the residents were a combination of Low Care and High Care. This concerns me because Dad still has quite lucid days. It disturbed Dad to the point where he screamed out from bed during the evening, 'if I get sick don't take me anywhere'. Later I was up because I couldn't sleep and he got up and said 'I'm your Father, I'm going to die, I'm going to throw myself of a building'...oh dear! That facility also had some great things about it. A large deck over looking a meandering creek in a bush setting. An absolutely beautiful setting but something wasn't right in that room.

So I have an appointment tomorrow at another place which has only 13 beds and is only for low care residents. They have a week vacancy for respite in May and 2 weeks in June. Fingers crossed again.

3 comments:

  1. My gosh, I got a shiver when I read that. Yes, those people were probably completely over-medicated to keep them like that. NO dementia patient is like that all day, or even for an hour some days...and for all of them to be sitting there silently is a huge red flag. I'd say they could also be scared to move, but if they're in the "dementia" area, they are probably too far gone to remember what they should/shouldn't be afraid of. I don't know, so many of these places have their residents medicated to a vegetative state by the facility's choice or the family's choice. Just be aware, and ask ANY family members/visitors you see...seriously, that is a must.
    Good luck with the other place, I am crossing my fingers.

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  2. Hi Laine,

    It will play on my mind for some time to come. I was thinking about the numbers the woman who toured us through told me...6 were high care...mmm 30 or so low care...no they were nothing like my Dad. They were just shells.

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  3. I had that same experience for SO long. My Dad was way too aggressive for the "normal" side of the facilities, but he was still far too high functioning for the side with...as you so perfectly stated...people who are mere shells of what they once were. It's too risky to let him stay with the non-demented people, but so heartbreaking to leave him where even HE knows he doesn't belong. I hope you find something else ASAP. I know it's difficult, hang in there.

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