Friday, October 30, 2009

When doing the right thing breaks your heart

Yesterday afternoon I went and hired a wheelchair and shower chair. This morning my cousin came over to help me shower Dad. It took both of us to lift and steady Dad. My cousin minded Dad so I could go look at another facility. It was like a miracle, the place is perfect. Dad goes into respite there next Thursday for 3 weeks and then it's highly likely that he will stay on permanently.

The Woman who gave the tour was interested and asked questions to what has happened over the past few years. She was INTERESTED and said she could see I was drained. She said I will sort this out for you!!! I was introduced to the head of nursing and she knew about Lewy Bodies. This woman was so switched on. Made me feel at ease to know they are up to date with Lewy issues. She asked if Dad's Geriatrician would be involved with Dad's ongoing medical issues and medication. They discussed which area would be best for Dad. I was so impressed. There was staff everywhere, busy, everyone was clean and even in high care people were being included in activities. Not left in a room by themselves. They have a married couple, and they organised a lounge room for them so they can sit together and have a bit of privacy. They try to accommodate peoples needs. I got such a good vibe and then...this was like a message to me, perhaps from Mum. I got in the car and sat there for a minute and looked up, their chapel was right in front of my car, and on the big sign I saw 'Salvation Army'. Mum and Dad were married by a Salvation Army Chaplain and Mum insisted that a Salvation Army Chaplain conduct her funeral. When I saw that Salvation Army Chapel, on the grounds, I knew that I had found the right place. An amazing sense of calm swept through me.

My cousin stayed for a few hours after I got home, for support. I was upset. His Mum is coming over tomorrow to help me shower Dad. On Monday afternoon his lovely partner, a nurse, is coming over to help me shower Dad. Thursday my girls are coming with me when I take Dad to his knew home. Lewy has won. We didn't make it till Xmas.

3 comments:

  1. What a tough situation... I really feel for you. I hope you can take some comfort in knowing you've found a good place for your Dad. I'm sorry you and your family are going through this. Lewy is awful. I wish you much strength in the coming weeks.

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  2. I'm sorry you are feeling so low about this. I'm sorry it's happening sooner than you thought. But, I am relieved that you found such a wonderful place for your Dad. It sounds great and the staff sound like they are very capable and caring.
    After a time of adjustment, this might turn out to be a very good experience for your Dad. It normally takes about 6 weeks for a new resident to adjust to the facility's routines and the employees and the residents your Dad will meet.
    I hope all goes well for both of you.

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  3. Thankyou both. I'm gratefull for your thoughts, kind words and concern.

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